Posted in Random Poems I Find Meaningful

A Forgotten Home

This is a piece that describes how I feel whenever I think about my mother and the family I have far away. They're my everything and I wouldn't trade the world for them.

A Forgotten Home

By: Anita Marie

Home is where your heart resides
It's where you can be whoever you'd like and find a safe haven within
The hush of the noise, the gleam of the night lights
The little things that just makes home a home

Some live in huts, others in mansions
In homes there is dining space for a family to share
Family could be a family of six
Then again family could just be mom and you
As long as there is a reason to get together, home will remain a home

It may be a freshly bought house or an ancestral home
Yet it will always be yours to treasure
Yours to cherish and yours to endure

Life thrives at the very soul of the hearth
Spreading warmth to the coldest of hearts and light to the darkest of souls
It's where you find that spark of hope that ignites the fire of your deepest passions
And that warm hand to hold when you think you're left out to drown in the ocean

But sometimes we forget home
We forget what it's like to build make believe fortresses with the pillows we sleep with at night
It becomes all too vague how we first rode our bikes and how we embraced the number of times we fell

Sometimes home slips from our mind when we're enjoying a cup of coffee at a shop
Sometimes it completely disappears when we're dreaming about the unknown feared in the dark

We sometimes walk through our lives with the knowledge of something else other than home
But no matter how far the distance we go
Our feet will always lead us back home

Nevermind how dangerous the road back may be
Home can be the house on the next street or thousands of miles east
Sometimes you realize you never left home
Sometimes you understand that home never leaves you
For every time you choose to leave it, home will find you

Without needing a map, a compass, or a GPS
Home will find you because home knows who you are
Because whether you admit it or not, home has always been in your heart

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Posted in Poems about my Health

Armor Plate

My first poem on this site talked about what suffering from OCPD felt like. This poem I wrote talks about how it changed my entire life. How it contributed to the greatest failure I’ve experienced, and how it altered my resolve. I’m still ambitious. I will continue to be. But for now, this is my story.

Armor Plate
By: Anita Marie

There are 2 kinds of people in this world:
the survivors and the achievers
For 20 years of my life, I’ve built up the reputation of being the latter
Smart, endearing, self-sustaining, with a golden resolve
A hunger for a legacy over something I really loved

But OCPD hit me, and it hit me real hard in the head
I’ve avoided too much blaming it but I did it instead
Why is fate cruel to me? Why does this exist?
Did I end up on the naughty side of the naughty or nice list?

I’m the kind of person who never had to show her tears in public
I usually put up a front and play some of my favorite music
To drown the sorrow I feel inside my heart
To ignore the emotions tearing me apart

Bits and into pieces, my heart went
My confidence and pride both so bent
On the verge of being broken, I still attempt to stand
Even when my feet has been struggling with the quicksand

If I was healthy, would I be better?
If I was healthy, would none of it matter?
My superiors call me lazy, my colleagues call me stressed
I do have something playing with my mind but I’m not depressed

I still crave the glory my former self worked on
I still enjoy the sunsets and trips filled with fun
My scars are many, this isn’t my first
I’ll keep fighting until I quench my thirst

A waste of talent, they called me
A failed prodigy, they saw me
No one continued to see me as an achiever
Thinking I ended up becoming a sore loser

But no, this is not my end
And I’ll tell you things I’ve learned, my friend
Challenges are there for a purpose
It’s the challenge of trying not to lose your focus

But all of that takes a really long time
I’ll disappear gathering what was mine
I’m gonna fade for a moment or two
But I swear, I will be back soon

I will be back again with a hunger for glory
I will be back so to those I’ve wronged, I’m sorry
I will be back so just you all wait
I will be back a survivor with an armor plate